Can the Couple Walk Down the Aisle Together Instead of with Their Parents?
Will it send the wrong message?
You love your parents, which is why sometimes choosing to walk down the aisle with your father but not your mother can feel uncomfortable. And if you have any stepparents, especially those you feel quite close to, the etiquette around your ceremony processional becomes even trickier. Add in the fact that, as an adult, you don't feel it's necessary for anyone to "give you away," and suddenly this simple tradition feels quite confusing. Instead of being escorted down the aisle by a parent or stepparent, you might be thinking about entering the ceremony with your soon-to-be spouse.
Is that too much of a break with tradition? Not at all. It's actually becoming more and more popular as the median age for getting married is at an all-time high (28-years-old for her, 30-years-old for him, according to the United States Census Bureau), and the idea of being "given away" doesn't resonate with today's couples. For same-sex couples, deciding which future spouse walks down the aisle first can also be tricky, and the same goes for pairs who have lost parents or are estranged from their families. In all of these instances, walking down the aisle as a couple might make the most sense. But before you make your final decision, weigh all of the potential implications.
It may hurt Dad's feelings.
Whether you have one dad or two, he may have been looking forward to this iconic moment with you for a long time. Talk to him about your decision, explaining that you're not rejecting him but doing things your way. Can you find another role for him to play, such as a ceremony reader or even officiant for the day? If it's really important to you that you enter the ceremony with your future spouse, explain why.
Remember that there are other ways to include the parents.
You and your future spouse could walk down the aisle together, but when you reach the front of the altar, have your parents and his waiting to give you hugs. Another option is to have his parents walk down the aisle together first, then your parents walk, then you and the groom.
It means you'll be missing out on a very special wedding moment.
Make sure you're really okay with the idea of skipping this traditional moment-there's nothing quite like the photos of a groom seeing his bride walking down the aisle (even if they already shared a first look!). If you are, go for it!
Realize that some guests may not approve.
And that's perfectly fine-it's your wedding so you get to do things your way. This modern option pays homage to two people uniting and is a lovely way to begin your marriage.