Skip to content

Top Navigation

Martha Stewart Martha Stewart
  • FOOD
  • HOLIDAYS
  • ENTERTAINING
  • HOME
  • GARDENING
  • CLEANING & ORGANIZING
  • WEDDINGS
  • SHOP
  • DIY
  • BEAUTY & WELLNESS
  • LIFE
  • NEWS
  • MARTHA'S BLOG
  • About Us

Profile Menu

Martha's Blog
Your Account

Account

  • Join Now
  • Email Preferences
  • Newsletter
  • Manage Your Subscription this link opens in a new tab
  • Manage Your Subscription this link opens in a new tab
  • Contact Us
  • Your Content
  • Logout

More

  • Enter to Win $10,000 to Makeover Your Home!
  • Martha's Blog
  • Weddings
Login
Pin FB

Explore Martha Stewart

Martha Stewart Martha Stewart
  • Explore

    Explore

    • 7 Things to Do in the Morning to Be Healthier and More Productive

      7 Things to Do in the Morning to Be Healthier and More Productive

      Kick-start your day by making habits out of these mood-boosting tips. Read More
    • Should You Refrigerate Bananas?

      Should You Refrigerate Bananas?

      It's one of your favorite fruits, but does it belong on the counter or in the refrigerator? Read More
    • This 3-Ingredient Homemade Weed Killer Uses Vinegar to Safely Remove Pesky Growths from Your Garden

      This 3-Ingredient Homemade Weed Killer Uses Vinegar to Safely Remove Pesky Growths from Your Garden

      A few easy-to-find ingredients are all you need to create a powerful formula that squashes weeds. Read More
  • FOOD

    FOOD

    See All FOOD
    Our 20 Most Popular Recipes for Summer

    Our 20 Most Popular Recipes for Summer

    • Breakfast & Brunch Recipes
    • Lunch Recipes
    • Dinner Recipes
    • Appetizers & Snacks
    • Dessert Recipes
    • Drink Recipes
    • Salad Recipes
    • Side Dishes
    • Soup Recipes
    • Healthy Recipes
    • Quick & Easy Recipes
    • Vegetarian Recipes
    • Cooking How-Tos
    • Baking
    • Menu Planning
    • Food News & Trends
    • Wine
    • Mastering the Holiday Meal
    • What's for Dinner
    • All Recipes
  • HOLIDAYS

    HOLIDAYS

    See All HOLIDAYS
    The Most Patriotic Flowers for the Fourth of July, According to Symbolism

    The Most Patriotic Flowers for the Fourth of July, According to Symbolism

    Show your love of country by displaying these varieties on America's birthday.
    • Father's Day
    • Fourth of July
    • Halloween
    • Thanksgiving
    • Hanukkah
    • Christmas
    • New Year's Eve
    • Valentine's Day
    • St. Patricks Day
    • Passover
    • Easter
    • Mother's Day
  • ENTERTAINING

    ENTERTAINING

    See All ENTERTAINING
    How to Start Entertaining Friends and Family More Regularly

    How to Start Entertaining Friends and Family More Regularly

    Make gathering with loved ones a priority.
    • Seasonal Entertaining & Decorating
    • Baby Shower Ideas
    • Dinner Party Ideas
    • You're Invited
  • HOME

    HOME

    See All HOME
    We're Putting Up Walls Again—Is the Open Floor Plan on Its Way Out?

    We're Putting Up Walls Again—Is the Open Floor Plan on Its Way Out?

    We asked the experts to weigh in on this popular home design concept.
    • Home Design & Decor
    • Paint Colors & Palettes
    • DIY Home Projects
    • The Well-Kept Home
  • GARDENING

    GARDENING

    See All GARDENING
    A Month-by-Month Hydrangea Care Guide

    A Month-by-Month Hydrangea Care Guide

    Confused about when to do what to your favorite flowering shrubs? We have you covered.
    • Container Gardening
    • Flower Gardens
    • Houseplants
    • Landscaping
    • Vegetable Gardens
  • CLEANING & ORGANIZING

    CLEANING & ORGANIZING

    How to Wash Pillows

    How to Wash Pillows

    They're an essential element of a comfortable bed, so keep yours fresh and in their best shape ever with these expert-approved tips.
    • Cleaning
    • Storage & Organization
    • Laundry & Linens
  • WEDDINGS

    WEDDINGS

    See All WEDDINGS
    Who Pays for What for the Wedding?

    Who Pays for What for the Wedding?

    Get the traditional rules for who pays for the wedding details.
    • Real Weddings
    • Wedding Party
    • Wedding Planning & Advice
    • Wedding Ceremony & Reception
    • Wedding Jewelry
    • Dresses & Style
    • Wedding Beauty & Wellness
    • Wedding Registry
    • Wedding Showers & Parties
    • Love & Marriage
    • Wedding Travel
  • SHOP
  • DIY

    DIY

    See All DIY
    How to Melt and Reuse the Leftover Wax from Candles

    How to Melt and Reuse the Leftover Wax from Candles

    Our easy melt-and-pour method saves the last bit of this home essential.
    • Dyeing
    • Holiday Crafts
    • Kids' Crafts
    • Knitting
    • Paper Crafts
    • Sewing
    • Rescue & Revamp
  • BEAUTY & WELLNESS

    BEAUTY & WELLNESS

    Can Rice Water Really Encourage Hair Growth?

    Can Rice Water Really Encourage Hair Growth?

    This buzzy ingredient is a star player in many new-age hair care products.
    • Beauty
    • Health & Wellness
    • Live Well
  • LIFE

    LIFE

    See All LIFE
    • Family
    • Pets
    • Travel
    • Net Worth
  • NEWS
  • MARTHA'S BLOG
  • About Us

Profile Menu

Martha's Blog
Your Account

Account

  • Join Now
  • Email Preferences
  • Newsletter
  • Manage Your Subscription this link opens in a new tab
  • Manage Your Subscription this link opens in a new tab
  • Contact Us
  • Your Content
  • Logout

More

  • Enter to Win $10,000 to Makeover Your Home!
  • Martha's Blog
  • Weddings
Login
Sweepstakes

Follow Us

  1. marthastewart.com
  2. Weddings
  3. Wedding Beauty & Wellness
  4. 10 Common Wedding-Stress Triggers—and How to Deal with Them
Martha Stewart Weddings

10 Common Wedding-Stress Triggers—and How to Deal with Them

lauren pardee associate digital editor martha stewart weddings
By Lauren Pardee
Skip gallery slides
Pin
wd104849_fall09_wed0452.jpg

Planners offer their best advice on beating pre-wedding anxiety.

Start Slideshow

1 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message
family photo wall guest book display
Credit: Olivia Griffin

Your wedding will be one of the greatest days of your life, but—we'll just say it—planning the main event isn't necessarily easy. After all, there's a reason why no one fantasizes about creating seating charts or writing thank-you cards when daydreaming about their big day. Though it's important to recognize the realities of planning, it's just as necessary to note that the final product is always worth all the hard work and stress. Plus, you aren't alone in this process—no matter the couple or event style, everyone feels wedding planning anxieties from the same sometimes-unavoidable sources. To help you cope with it all, we tapped a few of our favorite planners for their best stress management advice.

One of the main stresses couple's face post-engagement is pleasing their families. Both parties have their own styles, budgets, guest lists, tastes, and so many other conflicting opinions on how your big day should come together. Planner Jove Meyer suggests that, while you can't control others, you can control how you react to them. "I encourage couples to try their best to understand the priorities of [each] family, while also making their priorities known, as it is their wedding," he explained. Meyer encourages couples to be upfront about their expectations from the start by giving each family parameters to follow, and then taking it from there.

Of course, that isn't the only stressor couples face—which is why we've prepared more tips for you, ahead. The pros will help you manage multiple personalities and opinions, stay on track, and achieve the wedding you've always envisioned.

1 of 10

Advertisement
Advertisement

2 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Money

dani jackson wedding reception lounge in tent
Credit: Erich McVey
The Money Talk: 10 Things You Must Discuss Before You Get Married

"Not only are conversations about money difficult, but a wedding budget can feel like a big mystery," says Allison Jackson of Pineapple Productions. Even with a planner guiding you, costs often come as a surprise, she says. It's important to come to terms with the fact that very few couples can have every big-day element they want. Jackson's solution: Set a budget and educate yourself about the specific market where your wedding is taking place. "Take time to understand why certain things—like flowers or a high-quality photographer or lighting, for example—cost what they do," she explained. Follow this advice, and you'll set yourself up to have more reasonable expectations.

2 of 10

3 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Guest List

calligraphy lucite boxes seating chart display
Credit: Loft Photography
Your Wedding Guest List Etiquette Questions Answered

Finalizing a guest list may be the most stressful part of wedding planning. You, your fiancé, and both sets of parents often have opinions about who should (and shouldn't!) be invited on the big day. Cutting a guest can feel painful, but it's unrealistic to think that your budget and venue can accommodate everyone. Jackson believes that the surprise of the negotiation involved is what makes the process so difficult—and suggests meeting this challenge head on at the beginning of the process. "Good communication is key," Jackson insists. "Even when feeling emotional or stressed, do everything you can to remain respectful and to hear out everyone's thoughts and feelings." Her golden rule: Treating everyone how you'd want to be treated can help prevent unnecessary arguments.

3 of 10

Advertisement

4 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Vendors

beth-scott-wedding-beer-0672-s112077-0715.jpg
Credit: Clark Brewer
A Foolproof Guide to Finding Your Wedding Vendors

Juggling multiple vendors can feel like an impossible challenge. So many people bring your celebration to life, so it's important to stay organized and work ahead as much as possible. Planner Jesse Tombs suggests creating a detailed production schedule and timeline. Send the breakdown to your vendors at least two weeks before your event and ask for feedback and updates.

In addition, Meyer believes it's crucial to stay open and honest with vendors about any of your preexisting concerns. Making lists of possible fears, stressors, and potential drama that you think could occur on your day, and passing them out to each team, will help prevent any day-of meltdowns.

4 of 10

5 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Health

emme daji wedding dress and bouquet
Credit: Laura Gordon Photography
Avoid These 7 Diet Mistakes in the Months Before Your Wedding

Wanting to be in the best shape of your life come your wedding is a common and admirable goal, but it can lead to unhealthy habits. If you aren't taking care of your body properly, you're not going to be able enjoy your wedding day to the fullest. Meyer believes in setting realistic fitness goals while prioritizing body positivity and self-love: "Starving yourself to fit into your dress is a terrible idea as your 'hanger' will come out, mostly to those closest to you, and it will not be cute!" Don't be too hard on yourself—enjoy the celebration dinners and Champagne, while doing your best to maintain a healthy lifestyle.

5 of 10

6 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Center of Attention

first dance
Credit: Delbarr Moradi
Here's How a Couple Can Make Their First Dance More Unique, According to the Experts

"One thing I hear from a lot of my brides is that they don't want to feel like the center of attention," says wedding planner Jenna Lam. Spotlight moments, like giving a toast or having your first dance, can be daunting for some. She believes practice and communication, along with not taking yourself too seriously, are the keys to working through the nerves. Don't be afraid to ask for help, either. If you feel it would benefit you and your fiancé to take a dance class or public speaking lesson, go for it—you'll achieve a level of confidence that will alleviate some of your anxieties.

6 of 10

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

7 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Wedding Party

denim jackets with embroidery
Credit: Vera in August
How to Choose a Wedding Party You'll Love

Choosing your wedding party can stir up a lot of emotions. Although this should be a fun process, it's hard not to feel the regret of hurting other people's feelings. Having a large friend group can make things complicated, especially when you have siblings and other family members who need to be included. Meyer advises his clients to make a list of everyone they feel super close with. "See where that lands number wise and decide if that feels right. Maybe it's easier to not have a wedding party, and just have a squad to get ready with you. No favorites equal no hurt feelings, equals less or no stress!" he says.

7 of 10

8 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Getting Ready

kelly pete wedding bride tying blue shoes
Credit: D'Arcy Benincosa Photography
6 Things to Plan for on the Morning of Your Wedding

Most pre-wedding anxiety tends to come to a head on the morning of the big day. "The excitement often creates an undercurrent of nervous energy for everyone involved," says Jackson. When emotions run high, it's crucial everyone has the time and space to process what they are feeling. Jackson recommends scheduling in extra time while getting ready, which prevents a pressure build-up in case things don't run according to plan. "I have found that slowing things down allows everyone to feel more present, more in control, more relaxed, and therefore less stressed," she explains.

8 of 10

9 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Managing Expectations

ceremony aisle with circular backdrop
Credit: Adrian Jon Photography
Everything You *Won't* Be Thinking About On Your Wedding Day

Yes, a large amount of time and money goes into every wedding detail, but there's a good chance that something won't go according to plan on the day of—when those blips happen, it's important to remember what the occasion is really about. Meyer also stresses that it's crucial to trust the vendor team you've hired. Jackson adds that keeping a sense of humor is just as important (this attitude will help you remember not to sweat the small stuff!).

9 of 10

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

10 of 10

Pin
Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message

Thank-You Notes

david-tyler-real-wedding-getaway-car.jpg
Credit: Ryan Ray Photography
A Thank-You Note Cheat Sheet That Will Make Expressing Your Gratitude So Much Easier

Even when the wedding is over, your job isn't done. Sending out thank-you notes in a timely manner can be intimidating—especially when you know that every guest and vendor must receive one. To make the process smoother, Meyer suggests writing these cards as gifts come in: "Once you get a gift or a card, write your thank you note that same week—be militant about it."

10 of 10

Replay gallery

Share the Gallery

Pinterest Facebook

Up Next

By Lauren Pardee

    Share the Gallery

    Pinterest Facebook
    `
    Martha Stewart Weddings
    View All
    • How to Get More Bang for Your Honeymoon Buck
    • Prince Charles Reportedly Got Emotional When He Met His Granddaughter Lilibet for the First Time
    • This Couple's Farm Wedding Perfectly Blended Rustic and Modern Aesthetics
    • What Is a "Volunteer-Moon" and How to Decide If You Should Take One
    Trending Videos
    Advertisement
    Skip slide summaries

    Everything in This Slideshow

    Advertisement

    View All

    1 of 10
    2 of 10 Money
    3 of 10 Guest List
    4 of 10 Vendors
    5 of 10 Health
    6 of 10 Center of Attention
    7 of 10 Wedding Party
    8 of 10 Getting Ready
    9 of 10 Managing Expectations
    10 of 10 Thank-You Notes

    Share & More

    Facebook Tweet Email Send Text Message
    Martha Stewart

    Learn More

    • Contact Us
    • Customer Service
    • Media Kit
    • Martha's Blog
    • Advertise
    • Content Licensing
    • FAQ
    • Corporate
    • International
    • Accolades this link opens in a new tab

    Connect

    Subscribe to Our Newsletter
    Sign Up
    MeredithMartha Stewart is part of the Meredith Home Group. © Copyright 2022 Meredith Corporation. All Rights Reserved. Privacy Policythis link opens in a new tab Terms of Servicethis link opens in a new tab Ad Choicesthis link opens in a new tab California Do Not Sellthis link opens a modal window Web Accessibilitythis link opens in a new tab
    © Copyright Martha Stewart. All rights reserved. Printed from https://www.marthastewart.com

    Sign in

    View image

    10 Common Wedding-Stress Triggers—and How to Deal with Them
    this link is to an external site that may or may not meet accessibility guidelines.