You're lying if you say you can't relate!
Credit: Bryan Gardner

You've said "yes," the ring is on your finger, all the necessary parties have been informed, and now it's time to get down to business. Whether you've been pinning wedding ideas since (way) before you met your S.O. (hello, secret dream dress board) or just getting started, Pinterest can start off full of glorious possibilities but can quickly spiral into an ideas abyss if not reined in. While yes, you should gather your thoughts by board and pin, pin away. But, as you plan, keep a healthy perspective and don't go all board certified-otherwise, the following stages of a dis-pinterest can occur.

The wedding world is your oyster

Flowers and dresses and food ideas and décor styles: The realm of possibilities is endless and it's all at the click of your mouse. The ideas are overflowing and with so much to choose from, you are undoubtedly going to have the most wondrous wedding of the century. Sorry Will and Kate.

Inspo is so easy to find

It's everywhere! Your collection of boards is in the double digits. You never knew you could be so organized. There's the collection of fashion: tulle dresses, Old-Hollywood glam gowns, tea-length numbers. Then there's the beauty boards: updos, down 'dos, in-between 'do, 'dos with curls, 'dos with waves, 'dos that are deconstructed. And the inspo goes on, and on…and on. You're proud of your curated list of 50 themes with pins to each growing exponentially by day. In fact you might even get some sort of trophy from the Pinterest gods for breaking a record. Life is good.

You're dividing but not conquering

So many pins, so little time. As you spend hours flipping through all these beautiful boards of inspiration, a nagging thought starts to rise from the recesses of your mind: You actually haven't started planning anything. It's been a month of surfing and collecting, but a dress has not been bought, a style of décor has not been chosen and all you have to show is a virtual collection of ideas.

The Pinterest vortex sets in

Things just got real. Anxiety strikes. You have to make choices, like actual IRL decisions. And suddenly all of these photos and boards and pins start spinning around your head in one big wedding whirl teasing you with their unrealized potential. It's all just too much. You're paralyzed by tulle and taffeta and buttercream and ganache. City Hall is starting to seem like a much better idea. Serenity now!

Whatever happened to a good old binder?

No, you will not be defeated by roses and peonies and letterpress and engraved fonts and rustic locales and beachy destinations. You are better than this. You will not be the product of a Pinterest fail. And so, in one epic moment, you choose an option from each board. It will be an Old-Hollywood charmeuse dress; Veronica Lake waves, a hotel ballroom, and fondant, yes, fondant to grace your cake. And now all is right in the world and you are finally free to start making that first call-once you throw back a stiff one.


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