Should You Get Married on Your Birthday?

A wedding planner helps to weigh the advantages and disadvantages of combining these two special days.

jessica brian wedding birthday cake
Photo: Abby Jiu Photography

There's a lot that goes into choosing the perfect wedding date-venue availability, preferred seasons, and timing that works for the bride, the groom, and their VIP guests are just some of the many factors you'll want to think about. You'll also want to consult the calendar to ensure your chosen date doesn't conflict with any major holidays or important events. But what if the day you're considering does coincide with another important event-namely, your birthday? While most people celebrate this special day with dinner, gifts, and maybe even a party, some men and women might be excited about the prospect of combining their birthday and wedding into one blowout event.

Ultimately, whether or not a birthday wedding is right for you comes down to personal preference, but there are some advantages and disadvantages that are worth considering before you commit to the date. To understand, we spoke to wedding planner Hollis Starks, owner of Hollis Starks & Co., to get her take on a birthday wedding.

The events will always be celebrated together.

First and foremost, consider how you feel about sharing your birthday with your future wedding anniversary. Some people may love the sweet sentimentality of it-and the fact that "the odds are greatly reduced that the date will be forgotten in the future!" Starks adds. Other couples won't like the idea of jamming two special occasions in one day; separating your birthday and your anniversary gives you an extra 24 hours of celebration each year.

Your wedding will overshadow your birthday, at least at first.

It's important to note that your wedding will more than likely overshadow birthday festivities, at least on the big day itself. The bride or groom will sacrifice birthday wishes and presents for the sake of their nuptials. "Remember that a wedding ceremony and reception are about the union of two individuals as a couple, so the balance may seem a bit thrown off when there's a birthday in the mix," says Starks. In the years following the wedding, you'll probably end up receiving more birthday love than anniversary attention. Make sure you're okay with both of these scenarios before you start planning.

If you're not a fan of celebrating your birthday, it can be a great idea.

Some people just aren't big on birthday celebrations, and if you fall into this camp, a birthday wedding takes the attention off of you and puts it on your relationship instead. You can also look forward to ringing in your anniversary rather than celebrating growing another year older in the future.

There are plenty of ways to acknowledge both occasions.

One major advantage of birthday weddings is that you'll get to celebrate your special day with family and friends. "There are lots of birthday traditions that can be worked into the reception," says Starks. She recommends having the band or your guests sing "Happy Birthday" at the reception, hiring a balloon artist, or serving cupcakes and Champagne in the bridal suite while you're getting ready. Here's another idea: "After cutting the wedding cake, bring out a birthday cupcake with a candle, and have the bride and groom blow it out together. Follow this with a birthday wish for a long and happy marriage instead of a toast," suggests Starks.

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