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11 Annoying Food Terms You Need to Stop Using on the Regular

We all have that friend that thinks he/she/they are all that and a bag of chips when it comes to describing food: Nobody -- nobody -- is as good at eating as he/she/they are. But really, this person has just watched too many cooking shows. Here, some food words that we honestly believe no human should use in their day-to-day vocabulary.



Sample Usage: "There is a real lack of acidity in this dish."

Does it? Or does it lack lemon? Or worse, is it not bright enough for you? Just stop it. We're talking about a sesame chicken lunch special right now. 



Sample Usage: "This meal is divine."

The only Divine we know has arched eyebrows and killer style. This breakfast burrito has none of those qualities. 


Flavor Profile

Sample Usage: "The flavor profile in this dish is incredibly balanced."

Just ... I can't with you. 



Sample Usage: "Ah! I'm such a foodie."

This is just like calling yourself a hipster. No hipster calls themselves a hipster -- it's the way of the world. 



Sample Usage: "This dish is very herbaceous and aromatic."

The salad your roommate made with the leftover parsley and cilantro doesn't require an over-exaggerated compliment. Just say "thank you."



Sample Usage: "The merlot has a fruity fizz mouthfeel."

You sound like you have forgotten your words. Are you thinking of "sensation"? You can also just say "fizzy." See, isn't that so much easier?  

blueberry cupcakes
Photography by: Jonathan Lovekin

Nom nom nom

Sample Usage: "Nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom!"

Oh, are we children? I didn't know that is what is going on. Instead of talking like a baby, maybe just say that you like whatever you are eating. 



Sample Usage: "Slurpability is on point with this pho."

Do we need to call out the slurp? We know. The whole restaurant heard you eating it.


Symphony of Flavors

Sample Usage: "This gumbo has a symphony of flavors."

I'm not sure if an actual symphony would agree with you comparing its music to the bacon, egg, and cheese you just chomped into.



Sample Usage: "This cheesecake has an unctuous layer."

Really? Or, is it just greasy?